The hottest Self Substack posts right now

And their main takeaways
Category
Top Faith & Spirituality Topics

'Are Men Capable of Full Intimacy?'

Ask Polly • 3970 implied HN points • 24 Jan 24
🎭️ Culture Self
  1. Don't see your emotions as a liability when dating; be authentic from the start.
  2. True intimacy involves accepting the real person without embellishments or illusions.
  3. Being fully alive in a relationship means accepting imperfections and embracing honesty.

a nest in time

Secretum Secretorum • 353 implied HN points • 30 Dec 25
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. A "nest in time" is a recurring, bounded stretch of time devoted to a particular activity that creates its own private psychological environment.
  2. For a time-nest to work it must be a desirable activity and be treated as inviolable, reliably protected from interruptions.
  3. These regular blocks focus your energy and attention and refresh you by freeing you from other concerns, building a clearer sense of self and a deeper kind of freedom than scattered distractions.

Bayesian Updates Require Ego Death

apxhard • 76 implied HN points • 31 Jan 26
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Acceptance is like a Bayesian update: when you revise your model to fit reality you only change once, but rejecting evidence is like holding a beach ball underwater and costs constant effort and suffering.
  2. Suffering often comes from an internal split where your conscious story denies what your body and emotions already know. Bringing all parts of you into the same reality restores coherence and drops the tension.
  3. Real updates feel like a small death of your old self because letting go of fixed self-images is painful, but choosing to accept experience voluntarily (through practices like meditation or voluntary discomfort) prevents the extra suffering caused by resistance.

triumph of the diagnostic?

undefended / undefeated • 393 implied HN points • 05 Nov 23
🏥 Health & Wellness Self
  1. Design for disability aims to broaden accessibility and recognition of full personhood, beyond medical labels.
  2. There is a concerning trend of medicalization, with more diagnoses and treatments for various conditions.
  3. The paradox of medicalization raises questions about the nature of everyday suffering and the need for both biomedical and existential approaches.
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In Defense of Repression II

Litverse • 279 implied HN points • 06 Feb 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Repression could be a tool for building a new self by accepting and integrating past pain, according to Marcel Proust's Impressionist painter Elstir.
  2. Ernest Becker theorizes that repression is crucial not just for personal growth but also for maintaining societal agreement on fundamental truths, preventing a future with conflicting values.
  3. Projection, seen as a defense mechanism by Freud, is viewed optimistically by Becker, who believes it fulfills human narcissism and helps find purpose by prioritizing the outer world as part of the inner self.

confidence

bookbear express • 445 implied HN points • 28 Feb 24
⛪ Faith & Spirituality Self
  1. Finding something you're good at can boost confidence.
  2. Feeling loved and accepted, especially during tough times, can also help build confidence.
  3. Having supportive people who believe in you and care about you can contribute to a stronger sense of self.

Making Sense of Consciousness Part 8: Summing Up

Rough Diamonds • 13 implied HN points • 26 Nov 25
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Consciousness involves three main ideas: noticing things, being awake, and having a sense of self. Noticing things is the most important part.
  2. Being conscious helps us make better choices by understanding our own abilities and how they relate to our environment. It allows us to be cautious when we need to be.
  3. Pain and pleasure are conscious experiences that help us react to situations, but it's possible to perceive injury without suffering from it. Consciousness can vary, and this is an important aspect of our understanding of sentience.

Second-handers

The Voyage • 39 implied HN points • 06 Feb 24
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. There are two types of people: first-handers and second-handers.
  2. First-handers desire greatness for themselves, while second-handers desire greatness for the approval of others.
  3. First-handers stay true to themselves, while second-handers seek validation from society.

Models of Humans

10-year Horizon • 159 implied HN points • 24 Apr 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Learning often involves modeling others' behaviors, beliefs, and ways of thinking. We unconsciously create mental models of people we admire or learn from.
  2. Our brains and AI models share similarities in how they learn and adapt, going through training phases to recognize patterns and predict outcomes.
  3. Exploring and understanding our inner sub-personalities through techniques like Internal Family Systems can help us manage relationships with these models for personal growth.

On Differentiation

Autoscriptorium • 59 implied HN points • 09 Apr 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Understanding differentiation of self is complex and challenging, with the concept of a unified consciousness being debated in modern philosophy.
  2. In certain environments, individuals may suppress their ego and hide their true selves for self-preservation, sometimes avoiding standing out to maintain a sense of security.
  3. The existence of one's 'I' is questioned in a world where many people shape the surroundings, leaving individuals to ponder the significance of their own identity.

Learning to see better by learning to unsee | #15

pole • 78 implied HN points • 03 Apr 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. In the journey of learning and growth, it's important to embrace the process and not get too caught up in setbacks.
  2. Sometimes, the key to understanding and creativity lies in viewing the world from different perspectives and challenging existing perceptions.
  3. Learning to unsee and approach situations with a fresh perspective can lead to deeper insights and personal growth.

The happiness series — What makes us happy?

10x your mind • 79 implied HN points • 20 Oct 22
🏥 Health & Wellness Self
  1. Achieving the flow state involves becoming fully engrossed in an activity, disconnecting from the outside world, and losing track of time and place.
  2. Feeling one with oneself is essential for attaining the flow state, and it involves letting go of self-doubt and enjoying the experience without limitations.
  3. Having a certain level of expertise, a clear goal, and feedback are prerequisites for entering the flow state, while self-growth through constant improvement leads to more rewarding experiences.

AMBITIONS (UNEDITED)

Engineering the Future • 39 implied HN points • 29 Apr 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Life involves overcoming obstacles through progression and mastery
  2. Finding meaning in life involves creating your own values and direction
  3. Career development requires a balance of learning, earning, and building skills

Everything is Dominance Hierarchies

Muslim Musings • 6 HN points • 18 Apr 24
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. Our chosen career path often stems from a desire to feel important and special by excelling in a specific skill or domain.
  2. Life involves climbing dominance hierarchies that we unknowingly conform to, with associated myths that justify our participation.
  3. The pursuit of importance within dominance hierarchies is universal, regardless of the specific career or skill, leading individuals to invest in climbing these structures.

To see clearly with universal indifference

Meaningful Particulars • 65 implied HN points • 14 Feb 24
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. The ego, while well-meaning, often leads to negative emotions like fear, anxiety, and criticism by exaggerating threats that no longer exist.
  2. Eastern traditions suggest silencing the ego by giving up worldly desires, while Western traditions propose 'unselfing' to gain a clearer understanding of reality.
  3. Artists, unlike the Buddhist advice to detach, become deeply involved in their work, showing that greater participation and attachment to reality can lead to a clearer perspective beyond the self.

Boring but not necessarily meaningless

Internal exile • 26 implied HN points • 05 May 23
🎭️ Culture Self
  1. BeReal's new feature 'RealPeople' showcases famous individuals doing ordinary things to seem relatable.
  2. The concept of authenticity in social media often masks deeper contradictions and socioeconomic tensions.
  3. BeReal and similar platforms strive to commodify and sell the idea of authenticity, contributing to a culture of self-simulation and inauthenticity.

All Life is a Stage

Journal of Gurdjieff Studies • 0 implied HN points • 09 Nov 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. The post discusses the concept that all life is like a stage, implying that our lives are like a performance that we play out.
  2. The content assumes that readers have a basic understanding of fourth way literature, suggesting a specific level of familiarity required for engaging with the material.
  3. Access to the full post is limited to paid subscribers, highlighting the exclusive nature of the content.

Fragments, Chapter 8, pp.159-66 - Reading Club posting 30

Journal of Gurdjieff Studies • 0 implied HN points • 21 Apr 23
⛪ Faith & Spirituality Self
  1. The importance of understanding the concepts of truth and falsehood, inner lies, and the necessity of destroying 'buffers' that control actions, thoughts, and feelings.
  2. The significance of distinguishing between one's essence and personality, and the need to weaken the dominance of personality over essence to allow for inner growth and development.
  3. The exploration of will, fate, and accident in life, the impact of 'general laws,' and the requirement to free oneself from personality to create individuality, along with the scrutiny of money's role in spiritual work.

The Stoic Virtues are like the four limbs of the body.

Wayne's Earth • 0 implied HN points • 03 May 23
📖 Philosophy Self
  1. The Stoic virtues - wisdom, courage, justice, and temperance - serve as guiding principles for living a fulfilling life with purpose and meaning.
  2. Wisdom involves understanding oneself, making wise decisions, and exploring one's true potential both internally and externally.
  3. Courage is the ability to face fear, act rightly in adversity, and remain optimistic, while justice requires treating others fairly and taking responsibility for our actions.