The hottest Friendship Substack posts right now

And their main takeaways
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Top Health & Wellness Topics

The importance of odd friendships

Civic Renaissance with Alexandra Hudson • 319 implied HN points • 21 Oct 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Odd friendships can be beautiful and meaningful. They show us that people with different backgrounds can connect and grow together.
  2. Like the writer Hannah More, we can have friends from all walks of life. It's important to embrace those differences and find common ground.
  3. Having friends who challenge our beliefs can help us hold strong convictions while still being open-minded. This balance enriches our lives and helps us understand others better.

the disorientation of freedom

bookbear express • 688 implied HN points • 04 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Saying the right words or meaning well doesn’t guarantee someone will respond the same way; intentions aren’t the same as actions.
  2. People change at their own pace, and you can support them but you can’t force them; accepting that freedom is disorienting and sometimes painful.
  3. A long-term view can be comforting because people often change over years, and love can persist even when language falls short.

Hanging out with Lenny Kaye

Patti Smith • 14996 implied HN points • 26 Jan 24
🎨 Art & Illustration Friendship
  1. Patti Smith and Lenny Kaye enjoyed a day together in the city, reminiscing about past performances and exploring the neighborhood.
  2. They watched the movie Poor Things in an old-fashioned theater, appreciating the cinematography and performances.
  3. Their friendship spans over half a century, highlighting the value of long-lasting friendships.

Found in Translation

Seven Senses • 439 implied HN points • 25 Aug 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Friendship can look very different depending on where you are from. For example, friendships in the US can be more open but less deep than in many European cultures.
  2. The pace of life affects friendships too. In some places, like France, people take their time to enjoy meals and socializing, while in the US, there's often a hurry to get things done.
  3. Cultural norms shape how we see friendships. In some cultures, having a few close friends is valued, while in others, people might have many acquaintances but fewer deep connections.

What kids wrote in my eighth grade yearbook

Tao Lin • 1278 implied HN points • 18 Jul 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Yearbooks capture memories and feelings from classmates. They show how friends viewed each other during middle school.
  2. Interactions can shape friendships, even if they start with jokes or silly moments. They highlight the fun and awkwardness of growing up together.
  3. People often remember the little things about each other, even if they didn't talk much. These small details can create lasting impressions.
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Just Friends?

Seven Senses • 279 implied HN points • 01 Sep 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Sexual attraction can complicate friendships between men and women. It's common for friends to wonder if there's potential for more than just friendship, especially when they're single.
  2. Crossing the friendship boundary to a romantic relationship can change things, but it doesn't mean the friendship is ruined. Many people find that their friendships can actually become even more meaningful after a romantic connection.
  3. Cultural and gender expectations often affect male friendships too. Guys might feel pressure to appear strong and independent, which can make it hard for them to express vulnerability and create deeper friendships.

The Greatest Love...

Seven Senses • 339 implied HN points • 19 Aug 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Friendship is really important and can be more lasting than romantic relationships. Friends give us support and joy throughout our lives.
  2. As we grow older, friendships change but can still be very meaningful. We might not spend as much time with friends, but the connections can get deeper with age.
  3. Friendship breakups can be really painful, and it's natural for friendships to move closer or further apart over time. It's okay for relationships to evolve and still hold love.

Are you texting a lot or what?

Maybe Baby • 507 implied HN points • 07 Jan 26
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Texting can start to feel like a job, where people treat replies as tasks they need to schedule.
  2. Group chats and unread messages often create a backlog that people plan to ‘‘get caught up’’ on later.
  3. Friends sometimes develop shared habits for managing messages, turning casual conversation into coordinated responsibilities.

Your Friends are Your Destiny

In My Tribe • 683 implied HN points • 03 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Your friends shape who you become. If they are positive influences, you'll likely be positive too.
  2. Hanging out with a diverse group of friends can make your life richer and more interesting.
  3. Creating connections among friends can lead to lasting relationships and happy lives, so it's good to encourage friendship.

Songs of the Day and Cross-Country Soup

Hoarse Whisperings • 2456 implied HN points • 27 Jan 24
🎶 Music Friendship
  1. Sending music as a care package can be a thoughtful gesture to someone in need of support.
  2. Love is shown through the small, everyday efforts and actions we do for others.
  3. Music can be comforting and act as a soundtrack to help us through struggles and difficult times.

The Loneliest Decades of Our Lives

Culture Study • 4988 implied HN points • 05 Feb 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Many people experience a drop in friendships during their late 20s to 40s. This period can feel lonely as work and family take up most of our time.
  2. Older adults tend to have more close friends, possibly because they have more time to socialize and engage in community activities. They often bring a practiced understanding of building and maintaining friendships.
  3. Prioritizing friendships can be tough in today's busy world. It's important to recognize this struggle and find ways to make time for friends and community, even amidst life's other demands.

An open letter to 56 people I know

Sasha's 'Newsletter' • 4473 implied HN points • 06 Feb 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. It's important to recognize and appreciate the goodness in yourself, even if it's hard to see. Everyone has value, and it's essential to remind ourselves of that.
  2. Friendship can deeply impact our lives, providing support during tough times and helping us grow. A genuine connection can make us feel normal and understood.
  3. We often admire others for their unique talents and perspectives, which might inspire us to reflect on our strengths and insecurities. It's great to have people in our lives who challenge and motivate us.

Is friendship romantic?

bookbear express • 363 implied HN points • 03 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Close friendships can feel romantic because they’re intimate and may create pairbonding, but they usually differ from romances by lacking sexual intimacy, exclusivity, and constant structural closeness like shared living or constant travel.
  2. If you want to date a friend, remember chemistry isn’t the same as compatibility; try gentle moves, respect the other person’s preferences, and practice clear boundaries so rejections don’t become avoidable drama.
  3. A friends-first approach to dating tends to make for healthier long-term relationships because you actually like the person beyond attraction, though dating friends can still risk changing or losing the original friendship.

How to Be a Joiner

Culture Study • 4155 implied HN points • 18 Dec 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Joining a community helps you feel a sense of belonging. When you meet new people who share your interests, it can be uplifting and comforting.
  2. Participating in regular traditions or rituals can make life more enjoyable. These simple routines, even if they seem silly, create positive energy in your week.
  3. It's normal to feel nervous about joining new groups. Just showing up a few times can help you feel more comfortable and connected, which is worth the initial awkwardness.

Conversations with a Friend

CRAFT TALK • 2692 implied HN points • 25 Sep 23
📚 Literature Friendship
  1. Allow yourself to write without pressure or obligation, just letting your pen move freely.
  2. Approach writing by treating characters as friends, imagining interactions and feelings to enhance your work.
  3. Experiment with writing prompts that involve observing, listening, and feeling to create a more genuine and dynamic story.

Baby's first PR crisis

Sasha's 'Newsletter' • 4017 implied HN points • 21 Nov 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Cancel culture can quickly turn a person's life upside down. It often feels more like bullying than actual justice.
  2. People can change their opinions and turn against someone really fast to fit in or make themselves look better. This back-and-forth can hurt businesses and reputations.
  3. It's important to stick by friends during tough times. Real support means standing strong together, even when facing mob mentality.

Time Is Love

Daily Dreher • 2063 implied HN points • 31 Oct 23
⛪ Faith & Spirituality Friendship
  1. Time is love - Show the ones you care about love by spending time with them.
  2. Express your love now - Don't wait for later to show your love and care for others.
  3. Regret can be a harsh lesson - Failing to prioritize love and connection can lead to lasting regrets.

Nostalgia

ASK MOLLY • 2162 implied HN points • 22 Mar 23
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Value nostalgia and the memories associated with it.
  2. Embrace a mix of indulgence and suffering in life.
  3. Appreciate the importance of maintaining love for the things and people in your life.

My Friend Max

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 2624 implied HN points • 13 Jan 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Max was a unique and thoughtful person who had a passion for living life to the fullest. He was obsessed with exploring new places and tried new adventures often.
  2. He valued the concept of 'value' in various forms, whether it was calculating the best meal deals or considering the impact of choices he made in life, like his charitable efforts.
  3. Despite his quirky habits and passions, Max had a deep love for the people in his life. His friendships were authentic, and he left a mark on everyone he met.

Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center

Culture Study • 7245 implied HN points • 14 Feb 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Friendship used to be considered a vital part of life through history, becoming sidelined as marriage took priority in emotional connections.
  2. Modern ideals often emphasize a spouse also being a 'best friend', impacting how friendships are valued and maintained.
  3. Cultural norms and societal structures make it challenging to prioritize and nurture friendships over traditional family setups, but it's about understanding the possibilities and taking steps towards meaningful platonic connections.

Embracing Bromance

Polymathic Being • 71 implied HN points • 11 Jan 26
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Men’s loneliness is worsened by the loss of platonic male physical touch, and that lack of affectionate contact harms mental and physical health.
  2. Two main forces caused this shift: the sexualization of male touch linked to homosexuality and the integration of women into formerly male-only spaces, both of which made affectionate male touch feel risky and diminished men’s bonding opportunities.
  3. Non-sexual male touch has real bonding and health benefits, so we need cultural, inclusive ways to safely bring back affectionate platonic touch without reverting to exclusionary or toxic practices.

Your Interesting Friend

Culture Study • 1872 implied HN points • 20 Dec 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. It's valuable to look closely at our friendships, especially those with unexpected people. You might find deeper connections than you thought.
  2. Some of the best friendships can come from surprising places, like people we don’t usually connect with. These relationships can teach us a lot.
  3. Exploring what makes friends interesting can help us understand ourselves and others better. It's a fun exercise to share these stories.

Coach Industrial Complex

thestoa • 727 implied HN points • 13 Jan 24
📖 Philosophy Friendship
  1. Approach the 'coach industrial complex' with cynicism and criticism due to toxic positivity and overpromising.
  2. There is a market demand for 'space holders' like coaches, therapists, and philosophical counselors.
  3. The coach industrial complex has the potential to improve interpersonal skills and lead to widespread positive regard without the need for paid services.

who do you go to for advice?

bookbear express • 682 implied HN points • 09 Jun 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. The people you spend time with can influence who you become. It’s okay to think your friends are better than you; it just means you have good company.
  2. Trusting your friends is important for healthy relationships. When you ask them for advice, it helps strengthen your bond.
  3. Friendships take work just like romantic relationships do. Maintaining them is key, and they can be more stable and supportive than romantic connections.

Katherine Goldstein on how to make friends as an adult

Evil Witches Newsletter • 1041 implied HN points • 07 Jul 23
🏥 Health & Wellness Friendship
  1. Making friends as an adult can be challenging, especially after significant life changes.
  2. Factors like changing relationship with alcohol, lack of time for social activities, and difficulty connecting at kid-focused events can impact adult friendships.
  3. Tips for building friendships include staying in touch, setting reasonable goals, and embracing vulnerability.

Aging Badly

SBJournal • 491 implied HN points • 06 Feb 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Debi faced unexpected challenges when she was cut from the dancing schedule after years of service.
  2. Debi's life took a drastic turn, including getting married and dealing with a tragic event involving her friends.
  3. The narrator, feeling overwhelmed by responsibilities, finally reaches a breaking point and realizes the need for a major change.

Culture of Criticism

thestoa • 471 implied HN points • 09 Feb 24
📖 Philosophy Friendship
  1. Creating publicly online may lead to facing criticism, insults, and negative judgments.
  2. Having protocols to handle online criticism is important for emotional well-being and response strategies.
  3. Engaging with constructive criticism and developing a taxonomy of judgmental feedback can aid in intellectual and moral growth.

#206: Hosting parties, having babies, being “original”

Maybe Baby • 1192 implied HN points • 26 Jan 25
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Making friends can happen at any age, and it's normal to want connection. Even if life changes, there are always people looking for friendship.
  2. Hosting parties can be a great way to connect with others, even for introverts. It's about taking a chance to invite people and create opportunities for fun together.
  3. Knowing when you're ready to have kids is personal, and it's okay to feel unsure. Communication with your partner is key, and thinking about your family dynamics can help you decide.

Your weekly links and recs round-up #37

The Shift With Sam Baker • 379 implied HN points • 16 Feb 24
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. The post is a weekly roundup featuring interesting articles on various topics like moving on from chapters in life, divorce stories, resilience, friendships, and interviews with experts.
  2. The content includes thought-provoking pieces on caregiving expectations, being an old friend, and insightful discussions on marriage, divorce, and aging.
  3. The subscribers get access to a curated collection of readings on diverse subjects, as well as exclusive content reserved for paid subscribers.

In Person > Online ⛲️

The Commonplace • 393 implied HN points • 30 Jan 24
⛪ Faith & Spirituality Friendship
  1. Twin vocations can complement each other well, benefiting both the individual and their families.
  2. Building connections with others is crucial, especially in solitary work, as digital connections can't replace in-person friendships.
  3. Progress in work is made through daily consistency, even if the results may seem unimpressive at first.

Amor fati

gen yeet • 668 implied HN points • 03 Oct 23
🎭️ Culture Friendship
  1. Death can manifest as omens in different environments.
  2. Living in a city can make omens less significant.
  3. Grief is a complicated and personal process.