The hottest Relationships Substack posts right now

And their main takeaways
Category
Top Health & Wellness Topics

Give Thanks to Your Husband

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 1915 implied HN points • 25 Nov 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Being openly romantic or grateful for a spouse is now often treated as embarrassing or uncool, with earnest feelings buried under irony.
  2. Pop culture has shifted from rom‑coms and marriage plots to divorce memoirs, polyamorous stories, and skeptical portrayals of men as burdensome rather than romantic partners.
  3. Many women downplay or hide their partners on social media to enjoy relationship benefits without seeming "boyfriend‑obsessed," and the piece pushes back by giving permission to be openly sappy and thankful for your husband.

How Not to Be an Incel or a Psychopath

Bet On It • 311 implied HN points • 05 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Dating culture has moved toward casual, short-term arrangements like "situationships" and "nanoships," leaving a lot of people frustrated and unclear about what partners really want.
  2. Many men feel stuck between being honest (and staying celibate), lying to get sex (and feeling guilty), or committing to someone they don’t genuinely like just to have a sex life.
  3. Both men and women commonly misrepresent themselves — about age, looks, or future intentions — and those mutual deceptions breed distrust, resentment, and unhappy long-term outcomes.

My Valentine’s Day in Prison

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 236 implied HN points • 13 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Being in prison means you're constantly aware of what you're missing because you're separated from your family.
  2. Even with little money, materials, or crafting skills, people in prison try to keep holidays and family bonds alive through small, heartfelt gestures like handmade cards.
  3. A conviction and prison sentence following an undercover sting can abruptly separate someone from their spouse and young children, showing how legal consequences disrupt family life.

What kind of grownup I want to be

Sasha's 'Newsletter' • 6558 implied HN points • 23 Jul 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Being a grownup means knowing the life choices you're making and why you’re making them. It’s important to understand what role you’re playing in your life.
  2. Grownups are self-aware but also look beyond themselves. They learn from others while also sharing their own knowledge and experiences.
  3. It's essential for grownups to manage their relationships maturely, avoiding unnecessary drama and focusing on making positive changes in their lives and the lives of others.

The Fermentation Principle

Anima Mundi • 412 implied HN points • 23 Jan 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Some transformations—like ideas, relationships, and personal growth—need time, the right conditions, and living agents to change; they cannot be hurried without losing depth.
  2. Treating everything with factory-style speed and optimization flattens meaning and destroys the slow, living processes that create real value.
  3. To encourage fermentation you must provide boundaries, the right pace, starter influences, and practice active patience—set conditions and wait without trying to fully control the outcome.
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The Science of Hooking Up and Settling Down

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 213 implied HN points • 13 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Many young heterosexuals are dating less and often get stuck in endless app messaging, awkward first dates, and little romantic progress.
  2. Pessimistic cultural narratives and toxic online subcultures have deepened despair among some men and made dating feel more fraught.
  3. People blame everything from the sexual revolution to economics and dating apps, but the conversation frequently relies on an oversimplified pop version of evolutionary psychology that mischaracterizes attraction.

#250: My best and my worst

Maybe Baby • 845 implied HN points • 27 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. A new archive organizes nearly 700 newsletters into 16 clear categories and formats so older pieces are easier for readers to find.
  2. Ten episodes of the Dear Danny advice podcast have been unlocked for free, making that content easy to share and listen to without a paid subscription.
  3. The year-end roundup includes a limited-time 25% off annual subscription sale, lists of the most and least popular essays and comment records, and a big, categorized compilation of reader recommendation threads across media, shopping, food, seasonal tips, and more.

Introducing: ‘Tough Love with Abigail Shrier’

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 1446 implied HN points • 02 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. A new weekly advice column called "Tough Love" will deliver blunt, practical advice every Thursday to paying subscribers.
  2. It aims to tackle real-world anxieties, illustrated by a reader worried that looming social chaos makes it hard to commit to long-term plans while raising young children.
  3. Readers can submit questions to the column, but access requires a paid subscription, which is currently being promoted with 25% off the first year.

The Sexbot Revolution Is Already Here

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 213 implied HN points • 12 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. AI-powered sex robots are becoming more realistic and widely available, offering a physical, interactive alternative to human partners.
  2. Many people—especially some men—are turning to tech substitutes like sex robots, social media, and paid online content instead of messy human relationships, and this shift is linked to people having less sex overall.
  3. If intimacy no longer requires another human, it could lead to fewer real relationships, the potential replacement of women in intimate roles, and broad social and ethical consequences we aren’t prepared for.

The Greatest Love...

Seven Senses • 339 implied HN points • 19 Aug 24
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Friendship is really important and can be more lasting than romantic relationships. Friends give us support and joy throughout our lives.
  2. As we grow older, friendships change but can still be very meaningful. We might not spend as much time with friends, but the connections can get deeper with age.
  3. Friendship breakups can be really painful, and it's natural for friendships to move closer or further apart over time. It's okay for relationships to evolve and still hold love.

A Man Should Know: How To Say Thank You

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 1367 implied HN points • 28 Nov 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. How you say thank you matters — a thoughtful, specific gesture like a handwritten note leaves a much stronger impression than a quick text or email.
  2. Feeling grateful is as important as the words you use — genuine gratitude is what makes a thank-you meaningful.
  3. Even busy people can and should make the effort to show thanks, because small, intentional acts strengthen relationships.

Feminism's Gains Come with Sacrifices

Journal of Free Black Thought • 8 implied HN points • 09 Mar 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Achieving gender equality has required personal sacrifices like losing preferential treatment, and those small inconveniences are part of the price for broader gains for women as a group.
  2. Some self-identified feminists are turning to postfeminism or anti-feminism because they resent individual costs (like splitting bills or sharing responsibilities), but that stance ignores the collective benefits of equity.
  3. Real strength and independence are built through hardship and accepting equal duties in work, relationships, and civic life; selective or conditional equity weakens the movement.

The Other Sexual Orientation

Knowingless • 6185 implied HN points • 19 Jun 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Not everyone experiences sexual attraction the same way. Some people, like those with BDSM preferences, have unique orientations that can define their sexuality just like being straight or gay.
  2. Sexual interests are diverse and can range from common to taboo. What excites someone may not be the same for another person, highlighting that sexual preferences are deeply personal and varied.
  3. There are different mindsets around sexual preferences, with some people being open about their kinks while others may feel judged or confused. Understanding this diversity can help people accept and communicate their desires better.

Are you texting a lot or what?

Maybe Baby • 507 implied HN points • 07 Jan 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Texting can start to feel like a job, where people treat replies as tasks they need to schedule.
  2. Group chats and unread messages often create a backlog that people plan to ‘‘get caught up’’ on later.
  3. Friends sometimes develop shared habits for managing messages, turning casual conversation into coordinated responsibilities.

Monogamous Humans, Erectile Dysfunction, Growth Minds

Rob Henderson's Newsletter • 965 implied HN points • 16 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Affirmative action often ends up benefiting already financially well-off members of the target groups, and affluent white women appear to be a large share of those beneficiaries.
  2. Erectile dysfunction among young men has risen sharply, with many heavy pornography users needing extreme content to get or maintain an erection while real-life sex feels dull.
  3. People across the political spectrum can believe similar conspiracy theories, such as hidden harms from GMOs, secret groups spreading disease, banks manipulating the economy, Holocaust denial claims, and sinister motives behind water fluoridation.

"May I Meet You?" Is Not a Bad Pickup Line

Rob Henderson's Newsletter • 1325 implied HN points • 17 Nov 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Your appearance matters, but it's not as important as you might think. Just being well-groomed can make a big difference.
  2. People often focus too much on finding the perfect pickup line. The truth is, it’s the connection that really matters.
  3. Being genuine and confident will attract more interest than any clever line you could come up with. Just be yourself!

Don't Use Menopause to Excuse Mediocre Men

The Vajenda • 7979 implied HN points • 09 May 23
🏥 Health & Wellness Relationships
  1. It's important to recognize and address anger and frustration, especially when facing inequality in relationships.
  2. Blaming menopause for relationship issues absolves men of accountability and perpetuates harmful stereotypes.
  3. Prioritize self-care and know when it's crucial to stand up against mistreatment in relationships.

TGIF: Gratitude Edition

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 959 implied HN points • 27 Nov 25
😂 Humor Relationships
  1. Be thankful for people who step up and act like the grown-ups in the room, such as the National Guard. They help keep ordinary life safe and steady.
  2. Value a workplace community that shows up with small kindnesses, like coworkers making cards for people in need. Those moments reveal how much people support each other.
  3. Appreciate a partner who makes you better and fights for what matters alongside you. They bring laughter, practical help, and steady companionship.

'Are Men Capable of Full Intimacy?'

Ask Polly • 3970 implied HN points • 24 Jan 24
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Don't see your emotions as a liability when dating; be authentic from the start.
  2. True intimacy involves accepting the real person without embellishments or illusions.
  3. Being fully alive in a relationship means accepting imperfections and embracing honesty.

Nobody Has a Personality Anymore

Common Sense with Bari Weiss • 3621 implied HN points • 15 Jul 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. We now label many personality traits as disorders, which changes how we view ourselves and others. Instead of seeing traits as part of being human, we see them as problems.
  2. People are losing the way we describe and understand ourselves. Instead of saying someone is charmingly forgetful, we call it ADHD, stripping away unique identities.
  3. There's a growing trend to explain everything about ourselves scientifically or psychologically, which is making us lose the mystery and romance of being human.

Alpha Male Losers

Erik Examines • 627 implied HN points • 19 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Influencers who sell 'alpha male' tactics give poor relationship advice; they often rely on manipulation, don't sustain real loving partnerships, and their flashy status symbols are hollow.
  2. Long-term relationships with educated, emotionally mature partners are more stable and better for children; making friends and being social creates real connections far more effectively than dating apps or alpha posturing.
  3. True leadership and attractiveness come from social skills, alliance-building, and emotional intelligence—not muscles, money, or online performance; aim for a steady, community-oriented life with genuine friendships instead of chasing fame or status.

do i secretly love all the things i hate?

Both Are True • 183 implied HN points • 30 Jan 26
🏥 Health & Wellness Relationships
  1. If a painful pattern keeps happening, that having can be evidence that some part of you secretly wants it; admitting that possibility opens a new way to understand your behavior.
  2. Deliberately trying on the idea that you might like the things you hate (existential kink) can turn shame into curiosity and play, making those feelings less powerful.
  3. Noticing that fear can feel like excitement and that you may enjoy roles like being a failure loosens self-judgment and lets you respond from choice instead of shame.

The work of coming home

Path Nine • 37 implied HN points • 26 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Being close to the people who know and love you matters more for a livable life than the perfect house, view, or spreadsheet of amenities.
  2. The high from a new place wears off. Chasing fresh starts won’t fix the things that actually matter because changing location doesn’t change who you are.
  3. Choosing to come home or prioritize proximity often means making hard trade-offs and admitting sunk costs, but it buys daily connection, support, and a deeper sense of belonging.

Women, not men, are saying no to dating

Sex and the State • 47 implied HN points • 23 Feb 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Recent data show many more men than women are using dating apps and actively looking for relationships, with a clear male majority among users and higher percentages of single men seeking dates.
  2. Women are increasingly saying no to dating and marriage, and this reduced willingness to couple helps explain falling marriage rates among the same groups.
  3. Possible reasons include class and economic shifts (who can be a breadwinner), changing expectations about partnerships, and cultural changes such as feminism that have altered incentives for women to marry.

Your Friends are Your Destiny

In My Tribe • 683 implied HN points • 03 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Your friends shape who you become. If they are positive influences, you'll likely be positive too.
  2. Hanging out with a diverse group of friends can make your life richer and more interesting.
  3. Creating connections among friends can lead to lasting relationships and happy lives, so it's good to encourage friendship.

Is Your Marriage Stressing You Out?

Ladyparts • 1837 implied HN points • 18 Apr 24
🏥 Health & Wellness Relationships
  1. Researchers found that in married couples where one did not feel supported by the spouse, stress hormone cortisol was present in their saliva
  2. Feeling supported, seen, heard, and loved by your spouse can help reduce chronic stress
  3. The impact of lack of spousal support on mental health can lead individuals to seek help from professionals like psychiatrists

My Art of Accomplishment Retreat

Erik Torenberg's Thoughts • 468 implied HN points • 23 Dec 25
🏥 Health & Wellness Relationships
  1. Change happens by feeling and moving emotions, not by blocking them; noticing and questioning the inner critic as separate from you weakens its power.
  2. Avoiding painful feelings makes you recreate the same problems and becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy; inviting fear or shame in and feeling it through lets the pattern stop.
  3. Long-term change comes from self-compassion, speaking your truth, and clear boundaries rather than shame or pure willpower, and regular practice plus community support makes progress durable.

Anecdotes From The Slutcloud

Knowingless • 3646 implied HN points • 26 Jun 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. Many people have strong opinions about promiscuous lifestyles, often thinking they lead to unhappiness or drama. However, not everyone in those communities feels this way, and many have positive experiences.
  2. Communication and openness are crucial in non-monogamous relationships. Creating a safe space for expressing feelings leads to better understanding and managing possible jealousy.
  3. A supportive community can help people feel comfortable with their sexual choices. When casual sex and connections are normalized among friends, it fosters trust and reduces insecurity.

Year in review 2025

Sasha's 'Newsletter' • 499 implied HN points • 18 Dec 25
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. I have an urge to tell people I love them and that I was happy in case something happens to me.
  2. I don't actually think I'm about to die — this feeling isn't from a real threat.
  3. Traveling abroad, like a trip to Mexico, makes me a bit paranoid even though I know the odds are low.

How to Apologize

Remarkable People • 379 implied HN points • 24 Jul 24
🚌 Education Relationships
  1. A good apology has three key parts: saying 'I'm sorry', taking responsibility for what you did, and showing that you understand the hurt it caused.
  2. People often struggle to apologize because they think it makes them look weak, but admitting mistakes can actually make you stronger and more respected.
  3. Effective apologies should be followed up with actions to prevent the same mistakes, make amends, and ask for feedback to improve.

Gay vs Straight Relationship Quality (Graph Dump)

Knowingless • 202 implied HN points • 25 Jan 26
🎭️ Culture Relationships
  1. It compares how happy people in gay and lesbian relationships are versus people in straight relationships.
  2. The findings are based on a survey that was framed as unrelated to relationship quality, which helps reduce bias in responses.
  3. The piece uses a graph-heavy dump of data and visualizations to illustrate differences in relationship quality.